Farewell, My Heart

On Friday, the 20th of December, I had to say goodbye to my Samhain, my Sam, Sam the Man, Sam-Sam. I am crushed beyond words, so I'll try to spend a minimal time on the sad, and share some of the cherished memories.

Our last photo on Friday afternoon.

Sam had been fighting Hemangiosarcoma since sometime before the end of March. Just before my birthday (which seems to be the time for things to collapse to utter garbage), he was diagnosed with splenic Hemangiosarcoma, and had the splenectomy.

Friday, after a very good day at work, the dogs got their dinner. Within a short time, Sam started showing the symptoms of bloat, and I rushed him to the emergency vet. (My dad was very brave and didn't scream once as we were racing to the vet and weaving in and out of traffic!) The vet confirmed my apprehension, and said she thought there was another tumor which had possibly caused the bloat. Sam had thrown up a few times in the past few weeks, which was unusual, and putting that together with the bloat, I felt the time had come to let him go. He was already six months past his prognosis, and putting him through a surgery would not have been the kindest thing to do for him.

There are a bunch of posts about Sam here (a couple popped up in search that don't have anything to do with him) which go back to the very beginning, when he was a newborn.

Last week at the office, helping out in the archives

He was there for me when those I trusted most, loved most, left. He was always ready to play, ready to cuddle, ready to go for an adventure, ready to hang out and watch movies. He loved people so much that he was the unofficial greeter of the UPS store next door to the office. People went nuts over him. 

The kids this past Hallowe'en were telling other kids and parents that there was a "really awesome dog" at my house that they had to meet. The babies thumped him hard on the head and he just gave them tiny little kisses on their chubby legs. The toddlers threw their little arms around his neck and he stood still so he didn't knock them over. The teenage girls fawned over him and called him handsome, and he preened and gave them mighty slurps and giant, full-body wags. The moms and dads were amazed at what a good boy I had.

He adored them, one and all.

And he was good to the newest addition of our family, even though she's a terrible brat and does not care about pleasing anyone, unlike my Sam, who was crushed to report he had, in fact, tipped over the trash can.

I don't know what I'm going to do without him.