Dreamer

Over the years, I've had to admit that I'm a dreamer. I blame my reading habits. And my movie habits, too come to think of it...

For instance, every time I read Sunshine, by Robin McKinley, I dream of becoming a baker (in addition to being a very special kind of heroine, who always does the right thing at the right time.), getting up early every morning and creating incredibly addicting confections for an adoring crowd of regulars. Hey, I like baking, so why not, right?

Of course, reading her books The Blue Sword and The Hero and the Crown make me want to be the plucky heroine who winds up saving--and subsequently wisely ruling--her country. But I digress...

War for the Oaks makes me want to go back to my 80s years to play guitar and be the lead singer in a band. Dealing with the Queen of Air and Darkness would be a bonus. Of course, it also feeds into my Jessica Rabbit fantasy of becoming an incredibly well-drawn torch singer. (P.S. I am also considering a career as a Ninja, klutziness notwithstanding.)

I know you have some of these fantasies, too. Admit it!

Yesterday, I watched a documentary on Amazon, called, Advanced Style. It's about a group of over-60 women living in New York who still have an incredible sense of style, completely ignoring the youth-worship of American fashion magazines.

Ari Seth Cohen had started the concept of Advanced Style as a blog, but it eventually became a book and the documentary, both of the same name.

Of course, it makes me want to become an elderly fashion maven.

Yes, a few of the women are a bit nutty, but they still hold a certain amount of grace and class. They remind me a bit of my heroine, Beatrice Wood. They've hit that age where their hormones are no longer enslaving them, their children don't need them so much, and they pretty much no longer care what people think of them. They've hit that magical age, when women can be unapologetically themselves.

Speaking of which, I've recently realized (again) that I am not the person I wish to be. That I need to make some changes-and I want to make them. I used to have far more of a spiritual practice than I do now, and I felt a little bit more balanced when I did. If you've been reading this blog for any amount of time, you'll recognize balance as my main challenge. 

I tend to be a person whose speeds are "full-throttle" and "off." Not a whole lot of in-betweens.

So I picked up a set of CDs to help myself along.

Pema Chodron is a Buddhist nun, older, and with a great sense of humor. She's definitely seen a lot of life, and since she's American, she has an ability to connect with Westerners' daily life challenges and put them in a larger perspective. I'm looking forward to listening to these talks over and over again.

Maybe we can call it an early New Year's Resolution.